Saturday, September 30, 2006

Our Cookbooks are Here!

Our cookbooks are here! - I'm so excited! (For those of you lost, it is a fundraiser my mom and I have been working on to help offset some of the cost of our adoption). It's been a lot of work but we created a great product. It has 400 recipes from over 150 people - thank you to all who contributed your very best yummies! The categories include appetizer, soups and salads, breads and rolls, main dishes (which include breakfast items, seafood, chicken, beef, pork and even some vegetarian goodies), side dishes and desserts/cookies/candies.

Now the fun part - selling them! They are $15 each plus shipping. Email me to set up payment and delivery. Check and credit card accepted. Kelly's email. If you're local, I'll deliver your book in person so you don't need to pay shipping.

Thank you for your order and support!! Does this mean I have to start cooking?

Monday, September 25, 2006

Yipee!

The new referrals are out for LID's of 7/23/05-8/9/05 - that's 18 days worth! That's the biggest batch since September '05 except for January '06 which was also 18 days. That puts us 399 referral days away so let's pray for the trend to increase! Congrats to all the new mommy and daddies!!!
Salsa has new referrals posted

Lucky Ladybugs

Today we are proud to introduce our renowned guest writer and future proud grandmom, my mom, Sandy, speaking on the topic of ladybugs! Take it away mom!



One quick cursory view of Chinese adoption blogs show that there are ladybugs in the air. Ladybugs are dancing across the timelines, found in blog names, animated on blog banners, flitting through broadcasted music, displayed in nursery photos, and when an adopting mom is fortunate to find clothing with a ladybug, it is quickly snatched off the rack.

I am a gardener in Florida. You would think that I would see many ladybugs; but I could not even remember the last time I had seen a ladybug. In a rush to leave the house, I stacked the clean dishes on the countertop instead of putting them in the cabinet. When I returned home, I found smack dab in the middle of the clean dishes, a lovely ladybug awaiting my return. I was ecstatic! But then I got to thinking. What are the ladybug rules? Does my sighting count? I am going to be the grandmother – not the mother. Are sightings by grandmothers judged null and void? Is there a self-appointed ladybug judge who will yell, “foul play”! Are there guidelines here? How did the ladybug come to be a logo for Chinese adoption? Exactly what is the lore? Is there a foundation for the beliefs?

Here is what we know. The ladybug is a symbol of good luck in most countries. In Sweden, it is believed if a ladybug lands on a young lady’s hand she is measuring for wedding gloves; and the maiden will soon be married. In England, finding a ladybug means that you will have a good harvest. In France, if you are sick and a ladybug lands on you, it will take with her the sickness when she flies away. As a child who grew up in the US, I was taught if a ladybug lands on you, make a wish and blow her away saying “fly away home”. And, among the adoption community, a sighting of a ladybug means your child was born or perhaps the referral stork is in his flight. Either way, a sighting of that spotted beetle is lucky.

That is right. The ladybug is a beetle. (OK – Animalia, Arthropoda, Insecta, Coleoptera, Coccinellidae, Hippodamia) There are nearly 5,000 different kinds of ladybugs worldwide and 400 in the US. A female lays more than 1000 eggs in her life. She flaps her wings 85 times a second. She chews from side to side – not up and down. A gallon jar will hold 72,000 to 80,000 ladybugs. Ladybugs protect themselves by an offensive chemical smell and sour taste. (Don't eat one.) ; Her spots fade when she gets older. The Asian ladybug lives the longest – up to 2 or 3 years. And, yes, there are male ladybugs. They are smaller than females.

Most important to our interest is this fact: THE LADYBUG WILL NOT FLY IF TEMPERATURE IS BELOW 55 DEGREES. Therefore, do not be disheartened if you don’t see a ladybug during your ‘wait’. There is a valid reason. On the other hand, if you do see one when it is cold outside, REJOICE! It has to be the real thing! Your babe’s on her way for sure!

Even though I found the word ladybug in 23 languages, I did not find it in Chinese; but there is evidence that the beetle which helped the farmers in the Middle Ages was the Asian beetle. In Europe insects were destroying the crops. The Catholic farmers prayed to the Virgin Mary for help. Soon the Asian beetle came and ate the aphids. The farmers began calling the insect ‘Beetles of Our Lady’. Eventually known as ‘Lady Beetles’, then ‘Lady Bugs’. (It is recorded that the red wings represented the Virgin’s cloak and the black spots represented her joys and sorrows.)

It was a much later invasion that forever connected the ladybug to the Chinese adoption community. In 1998, there was a delay in referrals. That was the summer that much of the US had an invasion of ladybugs. Immediately after, referrals poured in with larger numbers than ever. So, there is a solid foundation for the lore.

Fortunately, I did not find any ‘ladybug rules’ in my research. We are free to make the rules up as we go. (Aren’t they the best kind of rules?) Therefore, in my rule book, sightings by grandmoms count! In my rule book, the ladybug lives as a sign that a child was born or the stork is in the sky. It is a fun symbol of the Chinese adoption community; and the lore will thrive.

The little spotted beetle will be forever endeared by those of us who sleep with dreams of a child in China.

PS: IT’S FOR REAL!! Both Kelly and Mike have had recent ladybug sightings! Now it does not matter if my sighting is ‘null and void’!

Saturday, September 23, 2006

My sweet husband

I was telling Mike about a conversation I had yesterday with an adoption mama who said to get her husband to agree to adopt included a full month of fights. He did give in eventually (and they also have a second so she won for sure). When Mike and I first talked adoption I knew I wanted to go to China but wanted to fair to Mike in his opinion so I didn't really share my true feelings at first. Just like my dorky self, I made a pros and cons list for domestic vs international (international never included anything but China) and presented them to Mike. He seemed to lean toward domestic mostly because of the need to actually travel to China - he's worried about leaving work for 2+weeks. Anyway, one day Mike came home and found me a bit weepy. He asked what was wrong and I burst into tears and they flowed like a break in the Hoover Dam. I mumbled through my hysteria that I only wanted to adopt from China and that I couldn't explain it but I knew in my heart that it is where our daughter waits for us. After my episode, Mike hugged me and said simply "okay". That was it; we filled out the application that day. So back to yesterday. I was sharing the conversation about my friend's difficultly convincing her husband and I had said, once I shared my true feelings with Mike, he was all onboard.

Now the sweet part - Mike told me that when people ask him why we chose China, he explains to them that he feels women have a mother's intuition and even though I don't have bio kids that my mother's intuition kicked in and told me the right path for us. It's as simple as that and he trusts in that. Thank you for trusting me Mike!

Shopping for me!



I've already been shopping to annouce to the world that I'm "pregnant" - bring on the questions strangers! I figure if I start practicing answering questions about adoption from China now with strangers, when Mia comes I will have my answers down pat! These came from Adoption Mama.com - link to the right under shopping if you're interested. The shirts came with a nice hand written note congratulating us on our "pregnancy".
Internet shopping is the best!

Thursday, September 21, 2006

So Much Fun!

Jags beat Steelers 9 - 0! We had such an awesome time at the football game!! My mom, dad, brother and Mike all go to the games and it's such a great family time. Mom surprised us with a cake for celebration of our LID - Mia's first Publix birthday cake! Any excuse for a cake! And on top of getting our LID, having fun tailgating, it was one of the most exciting football game I've ever been to. The stadium was just filled with electricity. The fans were great, no one ever sat down and the Jags played great, especially our defense. It was the first time in 25 years that a defending Superbowl Champ was held to a shut out. Wow, it was great! What a day, what a night!



Monday, September 18, 2006

YEAH!!!! We're officially paperwork pregnant!!!

33 days it's been since our DTC.
How much longer can it be?

Not a lot longer should it take,
To get our precious log in date.

Wait! What is this on my email I see?
Oh my goodness, it's our LID!

Finally the referral clock ticks,
Starting with September 12, 2006!!!

Another big step we have made,
Closer to our sweet Mia Jade!

Sunday, September 17, 2006

Is it Monday yet?

If you watch ESPN at all you may have seen their new catch phrase "Is it Monday Yet?" advertising Monday Night Football that is being shown on ESPN for the first time. Well tomorrow night Monday Night Football is right here in Jacksonville! My entire family has season tickets so we will be there; cheering, yelling and even a little drinking! I love football and Monday night football is even better! GO JAGS!!

Oh yeah; and I hope to get our LID!

Saturday, September 16, 2006

To my fellow DTC/LID'ers - time really does fly

Those of us with a DTC or LID associated with our name (yes I think my name is Kelly DTC 8/16/06 - like a sci-fi movie) are looking at a year plus until we see the face of our angel. A bit disappointing since the wait was 7-8 months (LID to referral) when we started our process. So it got me thinking, what were we doing a year ago - how long does a year feel? And it hit me - a year ago this week we tried our second invitro. It seems like yesterday. The day I went for my bloodwork to check if I was pregnant was one of the most difficult days of my life. I knew before I went that it didn't work and after the blood draw, before we knew the results, I sat in my car and cried like I have never cried. I called Mike sobbing uncontrollably. He tried to be positive, "Kelly you don't know it didn't work - just wait until we get the results". But I knew - I can't explain it. He was so sweet, telling the office to call him and leave a message on his voicemail so we could listen together like we did the first time. We felt either way, we wanted to be together when we got the results. This time, they didn't leave a message but kept calling until he picked up and before he could say our request to have it on voicemail, they told him "I'm sorry to tell you, the results were negative - no pregnancy". Mike came home, looked at me and melted into tears. I had already had my meltdown so I was able to comfort him now.

The next day I announced to Mike that I couldn't do invitro again without adopting first. We still have embryos frozen (again like a sci-fi movie) but I can't do it again, not until we already have a child. The pressure, stress, it's so difficult. I'm not sharing all of this so anyone feels sad for us - many of you have been in the same exact situation. My point to all of this is that it was a year ago! Is seems like yesterday. Time really does fly. And now we're paperwork pregnant, pregnant for the first time - I even think I'm glowing! So our gestation period is a little longer than a normal pregnancy.

Think about where you were a year ago. If you have a DTC or LID associated with your name, chances are some part of adoption was in your life at this time last year. In September 2005, we were closing one door and investigating another. We took a little time to "mourn" the failure of our invitro, enjoyed the holidays, looked into adoption options (I actually read "Adoption for Dummies"), started investigating agencies, talked to adoptive families and discussed our financial situation (our invitos were all out of pocket - no insurance help). So yes, we're just waiting for our LID but the way I look at it, we are a year into this adoption process and have a little over a year to go - so we're half way there, not just starting at our LID. And if you count since we started trying to get pregnant, we're actually 5 1/2 years into it and only a year to go. At least this time I KNOW it will happen - we WILL have a child!

Maybe this is just a pep talk to myself but thought I'd share my own pep talk with you guys. So hang in there, time really does fly!

Friday, September 15, 2006

LID any day now - didn't I already say that??

Okay, I haven't posted since Monday because I was hoping our next entry would be the announcement of our LID and as you may have figured, we still don't have it. I am always the "look at things on the bright side" kind of person so I didn't want to write being in a bummed mood, which I have been especially today, but man, come on CCAA. It's just a log in date. You're not actually giving us a baby yet or anything like that. Just write in your little log "Kelly & Mike Wilson 9/15/06". That's all I ask - it would really make my weekend. By law of math I predicted we would hear this week. The 8/14/06 DTC'ers got their on 9/11, so add two days to 8/14 and you get 8/16 (our DTC in case you are new) and add two days to 9/11 and you get....9/13 - that was 2 days ago. I guess math doesn't work in this scenerio. Anyway, gotta go check the email again for the 400th time in the past two days!

Monday, September 11, 2006

The Accidental Adoption

I can't take credit for this - it was posted on a Yahoo group board but too funny!

Thanks to Mark and Rebecca R.:

Have you ever noticed that you hear all the time about "accidental" pregnancies, but never about couples who experience "accidental" adoptions?

Can you imagine:

Honey, sit down. I have some news for you.

What is it?

Well, I don't know how to say this, so I'll just come out with it. I went out to the mailbox today and ... well, we got an I-171H.

A what?!? An I-171H? As in, we're going to have a baby?!?

It looks that way.

But how? We've been so careful! I put away all the blank I-600A forms. Didn't you hide our homestudy update?

Of course I did. But don't forget, there was that one night...

What night? (pauses) Ohhh, that night. But it was only once. We were just messing around. I didn't print clearly. I didn't even use ink! (pauses again) But it was kind of fun.

(giggles)

It was, wasn't it? I'll never forget how cute you looked getting your fingerprints.

So now we've got our I-171H, eh? But that doesn't always mean you'll adopt, does it? I mean, shouldn't you see the agency or something, make sure everything's okay?

I already did.

And?

I'm five documents along.

Five documents! And they're all notarized, certified and authenticated okay?

Just great. There was one small scare when the agency couldn't see the Notary's middle initial, but it showed up just fine under the magnifying glass.

Thank God. And you, honey? Are you feeling okay?

I'm feeling fine. As long as I know you're happy about this.

Happy? I'm thrilled! It's always a shock at first when something like
this happens, but of course I'm happy.

Saturday, September 09, 2006

10 Reasons Why Adoption is better than Pregnancy

Don't fret if you are following the path of adoption after the road of infertility; here are 10 reasons I have come up with that adoption is better than pregnancy - feel free to comment on your reasons!

Here it goes.....
10. No morning sickness
9. No stretch marks
8. No one can give you a hard time for not breast feeding
7. No need to spend all that money on maternity clothes only to wear them for a few months
6. No weight gain (that is as long as you don't sit around eating chocolate & moping about the long wait - stay active!)
5. My daughter won't have my family thighs! (insert your family curse here)
4. No need for a tummy tuck when it's over
3. You don't have to stop drinking - have a beer!
2. Your shoes still fit
and best of all...
1. You will still get the child God made for you!!

Thursday, September 07, 2006

LID any day now

Well, our dossier was sent 21 days ago and received 17 days ago so hopefully we'll have our LID (log in date) any day now. That is our official "start date" to our wait and the date used during referral batches. Several people on the Yahoo groups I follow have just gotten their LID and had DTCs date just days before us so it really should be anytime. I can not think of it as the start though, just the next phase, it just happens to be a the longest phase. Until then, I'm so excited to watch Salsa & Naked Ovary (favorite blogs-see links) go get their beautiful girls to keep reminding me how it's all worth it. They survived it, so can I!

Friday, September 01, 2006

Did you see Funshine...times two?

You may have noticed on my links a blog called Salsa in China. This has been one of my favorite places to visit on the web the last few months and she was so sad last month when they missed the referral batch by one day. Well they got their referral last week and I'm sure it was worth the wait of one more month....they got twin girls! Check out the site - they are over the moon! Congrats to Mary-Mia & Rod and all the new moms & dads out there!

6 months down & ?? to go

I realized that we recently pasted our 6 month mark from when we started our adoption process. We sent our application on February 20, got our call that we were approved on February 24 and got our home study packet on March 3, so somewhere in there is our official start date. So with that being said, 6 months have gone by and it seems like a blink of an eye. I remember Mike and my discussion about adoption from China vs. domestic adoption. I felt from the start that our daughter was going to be from China and expressed this to Mike - he saw my resolve and said okay, if that's what you think we should do. Within 2 days I had the application completed and on the way to CCAI (I had already done my research and was ready to go!). So 6 months seems like nothing now. Does that mean the next 6 months will be just as easy. I'm not sure about that; I've already had a few pitty party days but the good news is that it's football season! Football season always flies by so in no time 6 more months will have passed! I know it will be much longer than 6 months until our referral but I'm going to look at it in 6 month increments, not an overwhelming 14 months. Baby steps! So for now Go 'Noles and Go Jags!