So today I had my first semi-offensive conversation about our adoption plans. I was talking to a man at the beach, best guess 55-60 years old, about the beautiful day and 4th of July plans etc and he asked if I had kids - the ever so common question for a 36 year old married woman - and I said hopefully we will be close this time next year; we are adopting. "Oh what a difference you will make in an orphan or foster child's life." So I choose to share a little more; "yes, we are adopting an orphan from China". "China! Why would you adopt from China?! There are so many kids here that need a home." Stay calm, this is an education opportunity..."there are a lot of kids in China that need homes also." "Let them worry about their own" was his reply. KISS - Keep it simple stupid - "All I can say is that's where my heart has told me where we are suppose to adopt". This should end the conversation right? Wrong. He replys, "One thing I can say about Orientals (I'm thinking to myself, Oriental is a rug dummy), they sure are smart." Can't an attempt at a complement still be a stereotype?
I know this was not a major interaction but it did give me a small glimpse of the future. I'm not the type to get mad at others ignorance of the situation. I found it interesting and a good practice run for things to come. What an odd conversation to have on the 4th of July!
2 comments:
Question: Why China?
Answer: That is where our daughter is waiting for us.
Hi Kelly - I had to check your blog after getting your message. I had a friend who got the same response from someone when she said she was adopting from Korea. I think it is great & best to educate people if at all possible but had someone said that to me in addition to telling them that my daughter was waiting for me in China, I think my response would have been, "so if you know there is a need in the U.S. what are you doing to help?"
Keep up your great attitude!
Tammy Cotton
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